I sing. As often as I can. Whether in front of an audience, or in my car, or with my students at school, or in the shower. I sing.
Each year, I sing the Special Music on the last Sunday. This year was no exception. Saralynn and I sang together on December 30th for the first time on a Sunday. I sang a solo in church for the first time around age 3 or 4. It has always been important to me to foster the love of singing in my children, if that is a desire of their heart. Saralynn has always loved to "practice" with me when I sing on the Worship Team, and has always held her unpowered microphone with gusto as we sing. She has begged for a long time to sing with me, so we sang together earlier in the summer. I sang a version of "This Little Light of Mine" by Addison Road that was so very cool- I stumbled on it on iTunes and still have never heard it on the radio, though I'm not sure why. Saralynn joined me on stage and sang the traditional "This little light of mine... Let it shine till Jesus comes..." and it was awesome. My baby was wonderful!
We sang it again that Sunday, and once again, she did an amazing job. I am one proud Mama.
Fast forward to Tuesday afternoon in the car. We were driving to get Carter when Saralynn asks, "Mommy, when we get to Heaven, will we still be sinners?" I had to ask her to repeat her question more than once as I tried to process what she meant. Once I gathered my thoughts, I explained that once we got to Heaven, we would sit at the feet of Jesus and sing songs of praise to Him and wouldn't have time to think about anything that would make us sin. She asked my mom the same question, and got basically the same answer... Sin happens and exists because of things going on in this world. Since Heaven isn't this world, there won't be room to sin... (paraphrased for a 6 year old, of course. I couldn't tell if our answers resonated with Saralynn or not, so I asked her how she felt. She said, "it's ok if you don't know all the answer, Mommy. I'm sure Mr. Frank (our high school and college minister) does. I'll ask him." She amazes me.
Tonight, Thursday, we were watching a rerun of this past Sunday's church service, and she and my mom were talking while I cooked dinner. I looked into the den and saw my mom in a puddle of tears. I don't know for sure, but I figure she said something that touched my mom...
As we were going to bed, she asked to lead the prayer tonight. Usually, I say a phrase and she and Carter repeat, but tonight, she asked to lead. My heart swelled and my heart caught a lump. :) The devotion in her church-provided book was about how she (it's written on her level) can share and show Jesus to those around her. She said, "we can tell them that Jesus died for us, not because He had to, but because He wanted to." We talked about her wearing her Children's Ministry shirt to school today and telling her teacher which church she attends. We talked about how she performed 6 Random Acts of Kindness for her 6th birthday. She said I showed Jesus when I took food to our friends who had their baby last week.
Jesus is becoming more and more real to my baby, people. That alone should be what I live for every day! I saw a Facebook post a month or so ago (actually, after the Connecticut shooting) where a Christian recording artist I follow noted that we as Christians should long for the day when Jesus returns. She also mentioned, though, that she couldn't help but want to ask God to tarry on behalf of her unsaved brother. I felt my heart crying for the same. Jesus, You know I want to spend eternity with You, but I want my children to be there, too. Please save their souls before You return.
I just can't help but think (and pray) that the day is coming soon when my daughter, my firstborn, my beloved daughter, becomes my sister in Christ, and that makes me want to SING again.
However, it is currently 9:53 PM and the only sound in the house is my typing, so I think I'll offer up a prayer instead. :)
"Let it shine till Jesus comes, I'm gonna let it shine. Let it shine, let it shine let it SHINE."